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inspirational love two

April 12th, 2010 admin 1 comment

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When I think of inspirational love, I think of people who continued to love each other in spite of overwhelming odds, separations, or tragedies.  I think that two of the best examples of this “trial-by-fire”, inspirational love would have to be Christopher and Dana Reeve.

You may know that they met when she was a cabaret singer and then married in 1992.  Christopher was known the world over for his roles in the Superman movies from 1978 – 1983.  So, it came as an utter shock when he was paralyzed from the neck down in a horseback-riding accident near Charlottesville, VA., on 5/27/95.

Because his injuries were so severe he considered suicide.  Unable to speak,  he mouthed to Dana, “maybe we should let me go.” She tearfully replied with these uplifting words, “I am only going to say this once: I will support whatever you want to do, because this is your life, and your decision. But I want you to know that I’ll be with you for the long haul, no matter what. You’re still you. And I love you.”  Thereafter, Dana halted her own career so she could take care of Chris and their 3 yr-old son, Will.

Christopher wrote a book about his life and his struggles called: “Nothing is Impossible: Reflections on a New Life”.  He and Dana spent many years looking for ways to keep his body flexible and exercised, because with cutting-edge therapies, he expected to walk again one day.  Though Christopher continued to do TV appearances on the Academy Awards show,  TV movies, and series, he and Dana were very much involved with his non-profit Christopher Reeve Foundation, which concentrated on funding for spinal cord research.

Sadly, on Oct. 10, 2004 Christopher died from heart failure at the age of 52, just after he’d finished work as producer and director on an animated movie called “Everyone’s Hero”.

Dana continued to run the Christopher Reeve Foundation after his death, but received a diagnosis of lung cancer in 2005, and unbelievably, passed away on March 6, 2006 at the age of 44.

Now, you don’t have to go through this awe-inspiring blend of tragedy mixed with tenacity to have an inspirational love.  However, for two people to remain together, you need to follow several criteria:

1)  Beyond an obvious physical attraction to each other, find someone with the same core values and principles that you have (opposites can attract, but in my experience, they simply do not stay together in the majority of cases).

2)  Find someone who could be your best friend, and make sure they have a great sense of humor (You’re going to need it in this lifetime!).   That means you want to be in a relationship/marriage with someone you can talk to about anything and have fun with; someone who will love you for who you are and not try to change you. (Changes in each person should happen organically if you bring out the best in each other).

3)  To find the best mate for yourself, you must first love yourself:  don’t expect someone else to make you happy.  You need to be happy and confident with yourself  before you can attract the right person to complement your life.  Otherwise, you’ll be insecure in the relationship and appear too needy.

4)  Make sure that the other person wants to work on the relationship/marriage as much as you do.  You cannot make it work if you are the only one working on it.

5)  Be considerate of each other:  continue to treat each other with respect and kindness even when you’ve been together for awhile.

6)  Be affectionate with each other even if you feel too tired, frustrated, etc., with the day you’ve just had.  It’s important to hug or kiss each other, or even just hold hands.  This lets the other person know you love and care for them.

7)  You must treat this as the most important relationship in your life (along with your children, if you have any) and make it your priority.

Inspirational love is not just something you hear about, it’s something you can work to achieve in your own life!

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